[00:00:00] And welcome to the scary goals club. I am your host, Hazel Robertson. And I believe that to make the impact that you know, you're called to make in the world, it requires setting bigger, scarier goals, and then becoming the person who creates them. That is what I am here to show you how to do. That's what we're diving into.
Mindset tools, tricks, really simple, practical, actionable steps. You can take and start applying straight away. Cause. Or whatever you believe, we have this one life that we definitely know about. Start making the impact you know you want to make in the world. Fear is not a reason to stop. We keep going. We work through the fear.
That is what we do in the Scary Ghouls Club. So come on in, come join, hit subscribe, and let's get started.
Hazel: I know, here we are. Okay, it's all worked. We're here, we're on some new software, and I'll do a little intro. Hi and welcome to the [00:01:00] Scary Goals Club podcast. I'm your host Hazel Robertson and I am here with the most amazing, amazing human Aisha Stenning Aisha welcome to the podcast.
Aisha: Thank you, Hazel!
Hazel: here, it's so good.
So Aisha works to create a circular economy. She leads business action in the plastics initiative at the Ellen MacArthur Foundation. And that brings together key stakeholders to rethink and redesign the future of plastic, starting with packaging.
Aisha was also one of my first ever clients, my, when I was doing pro bono coaching and built this course that she did for six weeks, which it was so funny, Aisha, I found, um, some of the videos from that, like the other week, I was like, oh my goodness, I had this, like, well, you'll remember, of course, but for anyone listening, I had this like little whiteboard.
I would like scribble, like I was holding it in my hand on my knee and was like writing stuff up on it. And like all of the videos I'd written out word for word the script and then I was like reading out [00:02:00] the script into the video and then that was Aisha's homework to read out. Watch the video every week but I guess we all kind of start somewhere.
I feel like we've known each other for ages and that we like have met in person but we've never met in person. Which is crazy and we have a love of the mountains and sustainability and nature and also there's been the synchronicity of this podcast which was I was literally about to message Aisha to be like I really want to have you on and you text me that morning to be like I have to let you know I've had two like massive wins which we will get on to and so here you are so thank you for coming on it's so good I can't wait to like pull out all your amazing content Insights and wisdom.
So, I'm up in Scotland. It's quite frosty. It's quite crisp out here. You're in England. You are in the countryside. What is a morning? Like, what was this morning like being in the [00:03:00] countryside versus being in London, if you had previously been there? And we will dive into like how you got here and all of that kind of fun stuff as well.
But what's it, what's it like being in the countryside?
Aisha: Yes, so, it was also really frosty here. we have vaulted ceilings. So all the windows, kind of face that way. So they were completely covered in frost. and so I open up the window and I get to see across the valley. So all of these trees and it was really misty this morning. So it was really beautiful with all the frost.
it's very quiet. It was really quiet. Which is, which is lovely. And we're right next to a primary school. So there was lots of like children, like messing around and just like lovely noise. So, yes, quiet, but also full of life. I would say the countryside, feels like,
Hazel: So good. And well, let's even, okay, let's like rewind back a little bit further. I was going to dive into that, but let's like go even further back and like, before we started working together, like before coaching, like what was different [00:04:00] then? What was life like then in terms of like, I guess it's like the reasons why you maybe decided to go for coaching of like, what was different then about that version of Aisha and like, maybe not having some of the tools that you have now, like, how was that different?
If you can remember back.
Aisha: yeah, no, I can, I can remember it really well. So, because you'd, you'd message saying that you were going to, you were looking to, to do coaching and you were looking to set up a course to, to help people, have better impact, be more productive. And it was just at a time where I was like, I've really got to get a grip on my procrastination.
It is so bad. And I, I was just, I was just procrastinating way too much. And it's all, you know, it's always been an issue for me. I'd always put things off. yeah. And, and, and, and yeah, and just sort of, you know, jump into, jump into like, fantasy land of like, books, or, or TV, or, or what have you, or, or be like, productively [00:05:00] procrastinate and do really amazing things, but not the most important thing that I wanted to do.
So I was doing a lot of that. So, you know, I was already, I was already like, you know, a fairly successful person, a high functioning procrastinator, basically. but it was not, you know, that comes with an awful lot of stress. when you feel like you, you know that you're putting off the thing that you really should be doing.
And so I was often getting quite stressed. I'd, I'd get what I call stress skins like eczema. and things like that around times where, You know, either I've been putting things off and so it's been building up that way, or I've been putting things off and you get this like intense moment of doing lots and lots of things because you have to.
Hazel: It's, you've run out of time to procrastinate. So I was, I was definitely in a lot of cycles of doing that. And so when you put that out, that you, this is something that you could help with. I was like, Yes, this feels so serendip I think I wrote, like, it feels like serendipity, like, I need, we need to talk, and so, yeah, that's where, that's where we started. [00:06:00] And because one of the key things, you know, obviously we're kind of talking about goals here, but really what underpins goals, goals are just, it's like the dreams that we have that we want to create, and it's like, what really underpins that is our time. So like how we are spending our time, like, are we doing things that are moving where we want to go or not?
And then our mindset, like, are we holding ourselves back? Or are we like, how are we, could we enable the behaviors that will help us actually take the action to create the goals? So what shifted, like, when you started being more intentional with your time and maybe shifting your mindset to, I guess, well, no, let's start with that.
What happened like when you started being like a little bit more intentional with your time?
Aisha: Yeah, I think, you know, I think I've had a really, unhealthy relationship with time before. So I think I, I was always late. I'm not saying I'm perfect now by any stretch, if any of my friends listen to that. I still, still might be late, but I, I definitely am much better at kind of, I have much better relationship and appreciation of time and realizing what, what you're doing.[00:07:00]
I really get to choose how to use my time and when you're not thinking about it, that's still a choice of how you're using time. And so sort of
Hazel: So good.
Aisha: yeah, it was a massive thing. and I think, Yeah, and also just really realising, having a better understanding of what I need, so like, if I do this, that has a knock on effect with this, and realising, you know, that you do need to rest, and if you don't build that in, you know, you can't achieve so much, and, I think, yeah, zooming out a lot more.
I think I was much more kind of in that really, I was in a really reactive state. So I'd always just be doing what was like right in front of me and what have you, rather than like looking, looking ahead and really thinking about what I really wanted. So sort of taking that more zoomed out look to time and, and I don't know, just like thinking about what life I really want to create rather than just this.
Just, [00:08:00] just life happening to me. Looking at time that way, being like, how do I, how do I really wanna, I've only got so much time, like, how do I really wanna spend it? So, yeah, I think getting that perspective was really, really helpful.
Hazel: So good. And I love that thing that you said. It's like. Even if you aren't thinking about it, like it is still a choice. It's still a decision of how you're spending it. It's just maybe your like, unconscious beliefs or your past programming, whatever. It's like you're still making decisions and spending your time in some way.
And it's like the more that you can make that conscious, be like, okay, what is it I actually want? And I know like one of the things that we then worked on, because it's almost like an element of, you know, when it's like we're in the procrastination and the busyness and the overwhelm of it, it's like, once we can get a handle on that, then it's like, huh, okay, now what, like, what do I actually want to create?
It's almost like we free up energy and headspace to then be like, okay, I'm not just like, you know, a duck, like, frantically paddling my feet, or like, just keeping treading water. It's like, [00:09:00] I've got, like, I'm in the kind of flow place. It's like, okay, now what do I want to create? And I know that was so fun with you, and one of the, like, one of the things that we were looking at was this dream job, and actually, how can you like create that within the job that you already had and just playing around with like, what it, well, it wasn't within the job you already had, but we can get onto that within your, one of your fun results you created, which was a double promotion, which we will get onto.
But first it was like, okay, what is like designing your dream job? And like, what is that? And pulling out like, who is that version of you? like when you are at your most creative, when you are at your most authentic green sparkiness self and like actually starting to break away from the belief that a lot of us have which is like work has to be hard and if it's not hard then it's not work.
So can you talk a [00:10:00] little bit more about that because that was,
Aisha: Yeah. That was such a big unlock for me. I, yeah, I, I had, I just didn't realize that I did this and I, I was, I was always in jobs that weren't. weren't quite right, but I didn't know why. And, you know, I was, I was perfectly competent at them and, and, and doing, you know, doing well and, and, and things like that.
And, but people always surprised what I was doing and, or sort of being like, you know, cause I wasn't really leaning into what was so natural to me. So more of the kind of creative side, more of the engagement side, more of the people side, I was sort of in these roles that were leaning into kind of, they felt hard, and because they felt like hard, that felt like work.
Another big unlock with this was just realising that I was really scared. Like, I just didn't realise how much fear I had, because I don't think of myself as a particularly fearful person. You know, I'll be the first person to, like, jump off something into the water or, or whatever, I, you [00:11:00] know, it's just not It's just, I just don't, I just, it's not something that I really think about.
And, and I just turned out, like, I just had all of this fear. I was, I was really worried what other people would think, or worried of doing things that felt easy, because that, also felt wrong or what if I did the thing and the thing that comes naturally to me and then it wasn't as good as I thought or, you know, I didn't do as well.
And I just had all of these sort of ambiguous, which is often when fear comes from. It's really, really, it's really unknown and undefined and you can't wrestle with it. It just feels really scary. So you just, you just leave it alone. And so, you know, the hard work, well, it was hard, but it was kind of straightforward work, so I could kind of get on with it and do it.
Whereas sort of, you know, doing the more, like, creative stuff and all that, which you can see, like, even my voice, I'm like, I enjoy it a lot more.
Hazel: energy's changed. It's so fun.
Aisha: was just amazing. It was [00:12:00] like, oh, actually, no, other people find this really hard. So why am I doing the thing that I find really hard, which I don't get a huge amount of enjoyment from? Why don't I instead do the thing that I find really easy, gives me loads of energy. I love it. And it's super valuable.
And I just wasn't treating it as work because it was just, it was just fun. But actually that's what people, those, that's what people really remembered me for. That's what people kind of, you know, when I lent into that, that's where suddenly people were like, Oh, Aisha's great. And then I'd go and do all this other really hard work that people didn't care so much about.
And then I flipped that at some point and started leaning into the stuff I really love doing more and sort of just let the other stuff go. And no one noticed and everyone was just really happy that I was doing this other stuff. And yeah, that's where I got noticed. And, you know, things happen like double promotion and all that.
Hazel: It's just so amazing because I think this is like a belief that [00:13:00] so many of us, I mean, I've done work to unpick this, but it's like so many of us have, which is like, you work hard and work should be hard. And it's like, actually, often that can mean, you know, there's a difference between like working hard, like focusing on something, but actually just being like, uh, and like work being a slog.
And it's like, the more that we can lean into. It's like, yeah, our natural gifts, which you were able to do and people are like, suddenly you're energized and you're like bringing others along with you and they see you at your most like authentic and your most, well talk about the green spark energy and your sparkiest self.
I don't know if you remember the phrasing that you put of like, the kind of visual of the, I guess that you had for like, when you were in almost that like flow creative state. I love that.
Aisha: Yeah,so when I was at Unilever, we did something called a Purpose Workshop. it was a really, it was a really good training and they got you to think about sort of your purpose and link it to something that sort of, I don't know, is to do [00:14:00] with, that you relate to. So someone did it on sailing, another person did it on, dancing, so they had it about ballet shoes and things.
And then my one I, I really love playing games, and so I linked it to, games that I've grown up playing. So, one's called Mahjong, and another one is called, Racing Demon, which is a card game. And so, my purpose is all about sort of, I realized my, like my values that I have are, joy, discovery and care.
Like those are my kind of core values, which is something I realized subsequently, but my purpose is all around that. So it is, I'm a racing demon mother of mind expanding green dragons,
Hazel: So
Aisha: is totally mad, but it means a lot to me, which is the main thing. and it's just, you know, when I am. When I'm, like, understanding, when I get a perspective shift, either I've got a perspective shift and I'm able to help other people get that perspective shift, which is the kind of, like, the fostering, the mothering, the kind [00:15:00] of, I used to call it driving, but, I like mother better because it's got the care element.
And then the green dragons are like, they're just those amazing things that you've just discovered and you feel like people just need to know. Yeah, either to help them in life or to help them in like a sustainable way or a company in a sustainable way or the world in that way, I think, yeah, it just really resonated with me on like multiple levels.
And then, yeah, we also had the, I believe there was this group called Bright Sparks and so I sort of also like, and I've often, yeah, I'm quite a sparky person so kind of green bright spark is like another way that I've kind of a smaller way of calling opposed to my long. Yeah. Might expand in Green Dragons, you know, things.
So, yeah.
Hazel: It's so good, and it's like, you know, you can, like, even as you're explaining it, it's like, you know when you're in that. And like, is there anything that you do now, or like, that you can tap into that when you're in that, like, energy and you're in that, like, place? Like, is there anything you can do that can get you into [00:16:00] feeling like that?
Aisha: Yeah, so that's a great, that's a great question. I, I do get a lot of, I do get a lot of energy from people and so from connecting with people. And so, a really good way for me is just making sure that I regularly have conversations with people that bring that energy. Sort of out of me because that's when I'm really my kind of like most, like, yeah, green Sparky self is when I'm connecting.
Like, like with this call you can see
Hazel: I know, I can just tell, it's so good! It's like, I was saying to Aisha before, when we got on, it's like, even just her photo came up and it was just, she's just like, beaming in it and I was just immediately like, was lifted and like, smiled, like before she'd even like, her video had like, come on, it was so good, it's just, yeah, you, like, the sun literally like, pours out of you, it's great,
Aisha: but I do, I do try and I, I'm, I do try and. think more about like, what's my, my [00:17:00] intentions. So when I'm, when I'm in a good practice of it, if like in the morning thinking about what do I really want to do today? And like, how, how am I like living by my values? Like what care am I doing? What joy am I bringing?
Like, How am I, how am I, what am I going to discover? Like, how are we going to be in those states? And I find that that really helps me bring back to, like, that more playful side, that, like, you know, the more silly side, the more, yeah, let's just see how this goes side, rather than the kind of more serious, because that's when I'm not being my, in my flow state, is when my ego's been taking, like, in the driving seat, protection mode and things, and I'm, and, And I can feel it.
And as soon as I do that, I try and stop now and just be like, whoa, okay, where, where's this all coming from? And I, I don't know if you remember, I have got it here. My, my book that I wrote, myself. Yeah!
Hazel: I love them. They're just so good. I've gone through so many.
Aisha: makes such a difference, so yeah, so it's a little book called How to, How to [00:18:00] Nourish Aisha, and it's got lots of learnings in it from you, Hazel, and all these things for when, yeah, to help me remind myself about like, yeah, how to get myself back into that kind of, I think of the most kind of authentic version of Aisha, which is her green sparky self.
So, yeah,
Hazel: I love that because it's so easy, like, to slip out of that sometimes. We're like, we can set up habits, but things can happen that, like, tip us off, or suddenly it can be, like, a few moments or a few hours or a day has passed, and we're like, the heaviness is there, and it's like, whoa, okay. And to be able to have, like, Just a really easy reference to go back to.
actually having them written down. That's so powerful to just It's almost like such a lovely list to look at, of like, ooh, which one, like, should I dive? Which one did I need and feel like called to do right now? I love that. That's so good. So, so good. And also, like, I think even just like the awareness of being able to catch yourself when you [00:19:00] notice there's forcing or there's heaviness or there's something, it's like, okay, this is like something's going on.
And I love that the question that you asked of like. coming at it with just that like compassion and curiosity of what's going on here rather than like oh I shouldn't be feeling this way like push push push which I know loads of us do and like can get into or maybe have done in the past but being able to be like okay like what's like let's just like take a pause and then just like shift your shift your state and then kind of go back to being your flowiest greeniest sparkiest self so
Aisha: Yeah, and yeah, and I don't, I don't think that will ever go away in terms of, you know, you will, there'll always be times where you where you're kind of, well, where I'm being critical of myself or judgmental and, and, and getting caught in those sort of loops. But I do think I'm, I think I'm much quicker at realizing it now.
And so I can kind of, yeah, sort of, break that cycle of kind of going [00:20:00] and so I don't tend to go in as deep and go in it for as longer in terms of those sort of spirals, because, um, I'm much more aware now of, of, of that because I just didn't, I just didn't realize, you know, I didn't realize how horribly I was talking to myself and, um, you know, and like you say, like, so much energy and time was just spent on me.
On that and I just I just it was so unconscious and then sort of bringing that to the surface as oh, yeah, it's um
Hazel: it is. And as you said, it's the energy piece. It's like the mental load of like the beating ourselves up and then we feel worse and then we beat ourselves up more because we're not doing something or whatever. And it just goes and it goes and goes. And it's like when we can just release that and like give ourselves a little pep talk or be like, as you just did there, it's like, you know, kind or curious to ourselves.
It's like okay and then it dissipates and then all of that energy just flows into like creativity and like moving forward and creating these amazing like dreams and impact and like that vision that you have for your life. And it's just, [00:21:00] it's so, it's almost like shifting from this past where we can get stuck in like the dwelling or like the present and just being like okay, where am I going?
And like redirecting ourselves to that. So good. And I do want to talk about this double promotion because like So fun, and I, like, how, I guess it's like, the question is like, how did you do it, but like, was there, even coming back to that time, what were some of your, like, mindset, things you were thinking about, or any, like, practices as you were going through that process of, like, kind of putting yourself forward for it, interviewing for it, like, what helped you, I guess, like, step up into that?
Because, like, People don't often really get double promotions, like it's not just like a thing. So, like, talk, go back in time and like talk us through how that was going a little bit.
Aisha: Yeah so I was
[00:22:00] I was working at Unilever and I was working on our plastic data, at the time so working it to help visualize you know the plastics data that we had in at Unilever at the time and Yeah, so what happened was my, my boss left. So we had a kind of a gap.
So, her remit was both the plastics and also the GHG waste and water. And so they needed someone to step into that role. We were a slim, slim team. So it's just us two. And then we also had this amazing team based in India who would help support and like we were who operationalize the data. And I mean, I mean, she was absolutely great, but partly because she was great and
the way we were operating, it was such a kind of intense time with, with only a few, like two of us that I guess you didn't really see what I did. I guess the, you know, the team would have thought [00:23:00] that she was, was doing a lot. And then when it didn't all fall apart when she left and sort of, I was then connecting directly with my director.
It was like, Oh, Aisha is doing all of this. She's very competent. And I think, I think, so one, I think not realizing that it's, it's really important to let it be known, like what you're doing. I think often we, Well, particularly a lot of women can shy away from, from doing that, it doesn't come as naturally.
I think we often just sort of expect, you know, like at school, you do good work and it's rewarded. You don't have to kind of shout out about it and often it's seen as sort of, a very unflattering thing to be doing to, to make it be known what you've, you've done. So I think one, I naturally had a bit more visibility there.
And two, I, I had been, I'd had some great coaching from you. and I also had, I'd also been doing an agile, coach course.So [00:24:00] the two together made me realize how much prioritisation is really important. And so when I was then. You know, in this case where my boss left, she didn't have to work a very long notice period.
So we just had this sort of gap. Someone did sort of step in half the time, but I was working a lot closer with my director. And because she was really busy. I was really busy. I would just be like, right, when I got time with her, I was very prioritised. I'd be like, right, these are the, the eight things that you need to, to do.
These are in the order. We're going to go through each of them in this sort of next, like, hour. And then she would just be like, oh, wow, thank you. So I guess I made that person's job really easy. And I made the most out of time because I was really conscious of it. And it wasn't really, There wasn't time to kind of, fanny around not doing stuff and be worried about how it might go or, or what have you.
It was very, I was just so like, right, this is the stuff [00:25:00] that I really want to do and I want to get done. And so having that focus, I think really helped and sort of, yeah, getting that time, time with that person. I think that, I mean, those, I hadn't, and, and then a big part was when we, When we talked about the, so we were looking at the sort of role and like what it, what it could look like for me, and I, and it was a real opportunity because I had been, I'd been in this, this job, but it was very much more like an internal focused role, quite operational, which is not where my core skillset is.
And then with going to this more senior role, it was like an opportunity to really step into that leadership role to, so to get to work with lots of people, to do a lot more engagement, both internally and externally. Yes, get more creative. And so I didn't, didn't just apply to the role just to get to sort of just to be promoted, if that makes sense.
I was wanting to, like, go into the role to actually look at it as an opportunity to get to [00:26:00] do more of what I wanted to do, because I was like, huh, I, working with you, I realized there was so many, I'd uncovered, I was like, oh, this is all the stuff that I love doing. And I saw it, I saw an opportunity that I could actually create that sort of role.
And so. I wrote my, I wrote my dream role. I wrote it to you, I think, first.
Hazel: fun. Okay.
Aisha: this, into the, into this, this sort of opportunity that this, this more senior role would happen.
So, yeah, there was stuff in there about being like an earth, earth custodian and like a nurturing people and, and all of this stuff. and then how that would work as a, as a senior manager at, yeah, in, in sustainability and yeah. They, they loved it, clearly. They were like, oh great, Aisha's a safe pair of hands, but we can really see now, like, she is a senior person who can really [00:27:00] prioritize, which is what we need.
She can work really well with people, which is what we need.and, and yeah, and then, and their only, their reservation was actually that I, after I got the role, she was like, you know, you're, you're a very collaborative leader, which is not, which is not normal. And I, And I was like, wow, like, for me, I just think that's crazy.
But I can so see it. Like a lot of people who get into leadership positions are not people. Who work that well with people. They are people who are very good at like, just, you know, ordering and, and saying right, this is my thing and da da da da. And, and obviously that can work really well because that divides work up fine.
And, and people are kind of, I guess they're very strong with boundaries and things like that. And like, I can see why that can be so appealing. But. Yeah, I found that really, I found that really funny, that that was, that would be a reservation, but thankfully I was able to show that that actually can be, which, and she recognised that as [00:28:00] well, she was like, that really can, it can be really powerful, but you have to be really aware of it because it's not, it's not that normal, yeah, so I got to, got to move into that role and kind of, yeah, start to shape it in the way that I wanted, which I just think people, you know, especially if you're kind of privileged and, you know, you've got all these opportunities, potentials, like, why don't you shape it into a way that you will bring the best out of you?
Because that's what people want. People want you to be doing an amazing job. Like, it's so powerful in a business if you've got people doing amazing jobs all the time, especially if they're, You know, there's obviously there's limits, like you can't just be like, I just want to throw parties all the time and things, which I would love to do as well.
Hazel: meetings could be parties. It's like, weee, we're all here.
Aisha: long as it's centered around core objectives, but yeah.
Hazel: Party, woohoo! So good. [00:29:00] And so fun. And I just love that, like, again, it's that intentionality. It's that, like, actually making the decision and being like, okay, what is it I actually want? What is this role? What could it be?
And then just being like, okay, and I'm going to go and create that. I remember there was the other thing that you, like, again, because you were, like, creating what it is your dream job was. you were creating that in your mind and like imagining it and visualizing it and it was like it's my job like this because you were creating it and it was like coming out of your mind you were like this is my job this is like so suited to me because you'd built it in your mind that it was like became then I guess easy to be like oh yeah I am the person for this it wasn't like oh there's this opportunity and like oh could I kind of it was like oh no I have like imagined this and like This is my job.
It was, you like, it was so amazing seeing you step into, like, your energy just completely shifted. It was like, this is my job. I am like, [00:30:00] an even more senior leader. This is how I am. And it was like, even before you were offered the job, like, that was the, it's like, you shifted your identity. You started, like, becoming the person as if it was already your job.
And I guess part of that was like, even what you were talking about when you were there speaking to your, the director, and it was like, okay, these are the things, da da da da da da, it's like the priorities, like, just your energy completely shifted, just like how you were being and how you were showing up, because you'd made that decision, like, oh, this is, this is my dream job, I'm just like stepping into this.
Even before you had your double promotion, and it's like that, because I think oftentimes a lot of people, when they're doing goal setting they're like, Oh, I'll achieve the goal. Then I'll feel more confident. I'll achieve the goal. Then I'll become a leader or whatever, whatever the goal is. And it's like, no, it's actually the other way around.
It's like, there's the goal. And then you become that person who already has it before you've even done it. So like you were. that leader [00:31:00] before you were even offered that job. Like, you stepped into that. It didn't happen after. And like, that's also how you created it. Because people saw that. They were like, oh wow.
Okay, it's gotta be Aisha. Like, a hundred percent. Like, this is her. Like, they could, you were like, then on this level with that role. It was like, this is just who you are. So I thought that was like, really fun as well. Of like, that identity shift that happened before you were even offered the job.
Aisha: yeah. I mean, I mean, this is, you could be talking about my latest promotion, Hazel, like,
Hazel: Okay, talk me through that one then. Let's say I've got other questions in different orders, but like, let's talk about that. Okay, we'll stick on promotions.
Aisha: and I mean, it's just, it's just the same story and it's just, it's just really funny as well to, but, but basically I, so, so I moved from, a program manager, so again, like a senior manager to like a lead, in November, so recently, and I, I had. I wasn't really gunning for it, sort of, you know, like, for like the last year or [00:32:00] anything like that, it was just, I was very happy in my role, and then I just started to do more things that were more leadership orientated, because that's where I, like, I could, I could just feel like that was where I was needed, and that's where I wanted to play, and, and, I, because I, I was worried before, because I was like, oh, I, You know, that's more responsibility.
Is that what I really want right now? Do I, do I want to take on? And I was, I was, so I was like, no, no, I'm really happy where I am doing my thing right now. And then I just sort of naturally just started doing more. And I was already, so I was naturally just taking on more of that responsibility, but it wasn't a scary thing.
And at some point I, I realized, and I was like, Hey, I should, I should be a lead because I am, I'm already shifting into this space and it's where again, I can kind of create another role that is my, is my dream role again like the next evolution of my dream role is like, and really is that original dream role that I wrote [00:33:00] Gosh, that was I guess three, four years ago
Hazel: Would have been three and a bit years ago.
Aisha: Yeah, so it's that role, still, and it's just, like, an even better manifestation of it, basically.
and Yeah, it's just, it's just really funny because exactly the same thing happened. I just started, my mindset just really shifted opposed to being kind of scared of that responsibility. Instead of holding myself back, I just started leaning into not holding Aisha back and just, giving things a go, being curious about how people responded to me, not scared about how they responded to me.
And that was just, and then just having, and just keeping doing more and more things that I really liked. And then everyone was like, ah, yes, this is, and I basically told, you'd love this as well. I told them that they needed me in this, in this
Hazel: so good. Yes.
Aisha: was like, you need me in this role. And so, well, and I, and I [00:34:00] created it as well.
I was like, we really need to have. this, you know, a lead role for this team. And then
Hazel: Oh my gosh, so you actually like, like, dreamed up the whole, like, position as well. Oh my god, I, like, I love that so much. That is so good.
Aisha: Yeah. so I'm really happy and it's, it's, it's great. I get to lead a team. I love like working with people. I get to work with lots of senior people in senior, in big like organizations. And I feel like I'm going to have, yeah, hopefully have loads of impact and sustainability. So that's very exciting.
Hazel: I just love that because I think there's often, I used to think this, I'm not saying that you did, but I think a lot of people do, that it's like, I imagined almost like coming, I was like I'll come out of uni and like someone will be like this is for you or it was almost like imagining that someone was like coming to save me and be like here's your dream job and like we've thought about you and you are the exact person for this or would like give these [00:35:00] opportunities and I can't remember when it was I realized that maybe it was like in my early 20s or something it was like Oh, that literally doesn't happen.
Maybe very rarely, or like you hear people get like, I don't know, maybe like, I'm thinking like actors or models or whatever, it's like spotted or scouted, but it, it doesn't happen that some, like, very, very rarely is someone like, here you go, I've been thinking about you and I'm going to give you this exact thing that is exactly what you want.
It's like, that just doesn't happen. Like, we have to decide what is it we want, what is it that, like, lights us up that is our dream, and make it happen. And sometimes that's selling it and being so sold on it ourselves that we're like and knowing that it is the thing that our organisation needs or like whatever it is and we're like by the way guys, like, we need this and I'm the person to do it.
And it's like putting ourselves out there, like no one's gonna, it's almost like no one's gonna come and save us, which can sound really like, but actually it's the best thing because it's like we get to decide and we create it and when you can offer something to someone [00:36:00] that you're like, I've thought about this, this is why, this is like the person, this solves all this, and they're like, oh my god, yes.
It's like you're almost like giving to them what sometimes it's like we can wish what people would do to us. It's like, oh this is exactly what I need like right now. So I like, just love that you did that. It's like not waiting for the opportunity to come to you. It's like, Oh no, I go and create that.
Aisha: And And I think the more you lean into it, the more the opportunity comes.
It's not like I had to, it's not like I had to push very hard. You know, I didn't push at all. Like, I really, it's really a case of just, the more you lean into you, the more the thing that you're looking for, like, finds its way of being created.
It's, it's quite mad. Like, that's how it's happened every single time, rather than sort of me, you know, having to really slog and, and, and, and find it because, just because it's, that does happen when I am not clear about what I want to do and, [00:37:00] and, you know, you're just hoping for that thing to land and whatever, but actually when you really just lean into yourself and what have you, it's amazing how, because you just start putting yourself into the right places and you're doing the right things and it, it just sort of naturally forms around you I find.
Hazel: that's so good. Even just building on that, like, what do you think or believe about, like, now about your ability to create, like, whatever you want?
Aisha: Yeah, I mean, I I do feel like the world is, yeah, it's like limitless in like opportunity. I really, I really feel that, that, you know, yeah, I don't know. So far everything that I've really set my heart on that hasn't had some kind of physical limitation. I really, yeah. I really [00:38:00] have been able to kind of, yeah, achieve in terms of goals and things like that.
And, I guess I haven't maybe gone for goals that are completely, a completely audacious, I don't know, like, I, I want to be Prime Minister or something like that, I don't know. But, but still, they've been pretty big goals still, and they've, and then I've manifested them in like a really, in a really, you know, relatively short amount of time as well.
So, so yeah, I, I do, and I feel like that's when you, when I'm really in my flow state as well, like I feel like that, you know, you get that tingle of like, anything, anything is possible. It's just, And almost, it's like, sometimes I can get overwhelmed by that because I'm, I'm like, there's so many amazing things that I want to do.
So it's making sure that you're like, okay, well there's so many amazing things, but really what is the, the most amazing thing that you really want to do? And then actually focusing. I think then, then if I really [00:39:00] focus on it, then yeah, I, I find, yeah, it's, it's, it's wild how much like, how things just, you can actually make things happen.
Hazel: even, like, what is your, do you have almost, like, a process? Because obviously you've done this with a few different goals. We will dive into some of the others which are really fun as well. But, like, do you have, uh, Yeah, is there like a process or certain practices or certain, you talked a little bit earlier about when you're forcing to kind of like shift your energetic state and like bring yourself back to more like you, but like what else, like what would be your approach or is there like some like threads that run through all of them that have been similar, like what do you think that is?
Aisha: Yeah, so, So, I mean, this is something that you showed me, but I, I, I practice it regularly, which is to, to think about all of the, all of the goals you might have, and then really surface what's most important for you, and then focus [00:40:00] on one or maybe like up to three goals at a time. And then with those goals, like, I really like, you got me to really visualise sort of completing that goal and what that would be really like.
And then make that goal really specific and time bound. So, you know, if it's a goal, you make sure you're like, I will know this because of X at X time. And I found that really helpful. So, so I had a goal of like this year I wanted to know where I wanted to move to. in the countryside. So I knew I wanted to move out of London into the countryside.
So I wanted to, my goal was to be set up so that I could move into the countryside by the end of the year. And, and then I was like, I'll know this because I have, you know, I think it was like been, I've been to [00:41:00] this many places and I've, I've, I've lived in, you know, I've tried places out. And then, so I was, I was trying to be really specific and then.
And then once I had that goal, something that we also worked on was sort of taking a massive action every day. I was like, what? Every, every day?
Hazel: still remember when I like did that challenge and you were like,
Aisha: week? Like?
Hazel: You're like, I'm sorry, Hazel, I've actually got a lot of other things on. Like, this is adding another thing in. I was like, is that true? Or is this your scared brain that's like, wait, I have too much. I can't possibly move forward with the things I really, really want to do.
It's like, okay,
Aisha: It was crazy. And, and so I remember being like, wow! Then actually, oh my God, it's like, it's so empowering. Like to, to think of something that sort of scares you. To like, and then break it down into some smaller steps, but they're still, in your mind, like massive actions. And so I remember there was this week [00:42:00] where it was like, okay, I, well, I want to just try living somewhere.
So we had Stroud on the list, and we'd only been there for like a couple of days, but I was like, right, I want to like, live in Stroud for a month. And so I figured out, I figured out when, when we could do that, and then, and I was like, oof, I don't know, like. I've heard trust and house sitters is a good, is a good thing where you can basically, you know, house sit for someone in, in return.
So you look after their pets in return, you get to stay there for free. And I um-ed and ah-ed and I was like, oh, you know, it costs a bit of money, and like, I'm not sure, and what are the times that work out? And I can't, and I had a look, and I couldn't see any, and then I was like, no, this is a massive action. Like, if I look at it, if I zoom out, It's 80 pounds.
If I stay for just one weekend, I've like made that money back. It's really, and in the grand scheme of life, 80 pounds. To me, it's not gonna be massive. make a massive difference to me. So, cause I was doing massive actions, I just [00:43:00] signed up to it. And then the next day, a place became available for exactly the time that we needed it for a month, which was really rare in the place that we needed it.
Cause there wasn't really anything. and thankfully, and, and these things go really quickly. So if I hadn't signed up, I would have literally missed that opportunity. just because I was taking massive actions. And then, so, yeah, so, How many, so yeah, so then we, we have sat there and we were like, this place is perfect.
And so then I took another maths action, which was to, to rent in this, in this area. So we moved in, in October and we absolutely love it, and yeah, so it was amazing how actually by just taking some of the, doing it, really focusing on it and doing something every day. Even for a very short amount of time, I basically did my, because it could have taken me, this, this, this had been in my head for five years.
We wanted to move to the countryside and I'd just been [00:44:00] too scared to take any action. I was just like, oh, what if we don't find somewhere like a good community or, or what if we go somewhere and we don't like it or like it's not right? Or, you know, I had all of this sort of, just very, surface level fear, like I wasn't really going into the depths of anything.
And then you were like What is the worst case scenario? And, and then I was like, well, I'll go somewhere and then I, and then I don't like it and I'll have to move back. It's really not, it's not a terrible thing at all. Like this might, still might not work out, but I'm not, I'm not scared at all. It's absolutely fine if it doesn't work out.
Especially because I've thought about it. I'm like, well, I'll just rent. So I haven't bought and put a lot of, invest a lot of money in it. I'm renting to try it out. So I think Focus, so in terms of focus, making sure I'm really prioritised, like what is it that's really important for me right now.
Making it really specific and then breaking it down into [00:45:00] massive actions. And then having a reflection mechanism to make sure that I'm, I'm really, I'm really working on that and I'm really thinking about that and I'm really taking massive actions. So every week, me and my team. meet on a, on a Friday and we talk about our epic wins and our epic fails of the week.
Hazel: I love that you bring fails in as well. That's so good. So
Aisha: because I want, I want us all to be trying and really pushing ourselves and, and doing stuff and not having a shame culture, like a learning culture. yeah, because, I mean, this did all work out really well with this, with this place, but there, you know, there were, there were some fails in terms of, I didn't think about.
September was my busiest time, at work, and we decided to do the second house sit in September. I just didn't think about my personal I just didn't think about that big, and it ended up being absolutely fine. We did find some, because we basically were house sitting, to [00:46:00] find somewhere to rent, and it ended up happening really quickly, so it was fine, but, you know, my partner was not that enamored by the idea that I might not be able to help, and so we had to, you know, move on.
Then we had trouble there, we had to like, we had to talk it out and stuff, but, But, that was such a good learning for me, so I'm like, Oh, now, I really, when I'm doing these big things, I really need to look at my life holistically, rather than just, you know, Like, am I, you know, is that a time where I'm gonna need to really focus on work and take more breaks and not have other stuff going on?
Or, if I do do that, what do I really need at that time? Which is what we ended up doing, so he just, you know, he cooked a lot of meals and stuff, which was really nice, so.
Hazel: That's so good. And it's like you said, even just like at the start of our chat, which was like, with the intentional piece and the prioritization, it's like, if I'm doing this, what am I not doing? It's like every, every decision and something you're putting your focus and energy on, there's like something you're not doing [00:47:00] and trading off.
And it's like kind of keeping that piece as well. That is so good. And even like, Because I remember, and you, you chatted a bit about it there, there was a lot of the like, the what ifs. You know, it's like moving out of London, what if this, what if this, what if this, what if this? And it's very easy like, when we come up with what ifs, our brain goes to like, all of the bad, terrible things that could happen.
Like, did any of them materialize? You know, like even looking back, not that you have to go into specifics, but like, or actually has it been more straightforward than you thought? And even just within that, like, what advice would you give to your I guess yourself five years ago that was thinking about it or like anyone else who's like has this big grand dream for some part of their life and there's all the what ifs of like what is this what if this what if this like what advice would you give to your past self or
Yeah, I think, So
Aisha: incredibly straightforward. [00:48:00] And By really focusing on where we wanted to be, like the fact that we wanted to be somewhere, the place then found us. And I think that, you know, because we hadn't even heard of Stroud. And then I was talking about it, and I would talk about it with, you know, lots of people.
I wanted to find out where they thought a place might be for us and things like that. And we were, we'd looked at Frome, and we weren't, so we were going to visit Frome. My sister was like, oh, you should look at Stroud. Like, I know lots of people, and I, and we were like, okay, we'll just visit on the way.
And we didn't, we didn't love the feel of Frome, and we felt quite downhearted. We were like, oh, we thought this would be really the, the place. And then, yeah. Went to Stroud and we were like, oh my gosh, like, this is the place. And so actually having it not be completely right straight away then helped us know what was right.
So even if you do have the, those sort of things. So I think, and I think it is such [00:49:00] like that feeling of having a dream and you're in a safe space by not realising that dream. Right. Because. Your your, there's still potential for the dream to actually happen. If you go after it, it might, you know, and then, but it's a really uncomfortable and easy, safe space.
'cause you know that you are, you are not really going, you're not doing the thing that you should be doing. And then when you are doing the stuff that you should be doing, it's just, I mean, it's just the, it's just the best feeling. You are, you know, you are being, you know, you are being so intentional with your life.
You know, you are, you are really, yeah. You're really sort of. You really are doing what you should be doing, right? It's that sort of, and, and you just, yeah, it's just, it's just like, and, and, and I guess, you know, it aligns so much with my values of like, discovery and joy, because it's like, I keep discovering new things about this place, and like, that brings me so much joy.
And [00:50:00] so, yeah, I guess, to my past, I mean, it's just, just, you know, I, I would tell them, like, I completely understand why you're, why you're not going for things, and why you're scared. But, like, really sit with that fear and, and understand it better, like, where is it really coming from, what are you really scared of, and then, and then it, it will, that will dissipate and you'll realise that you can just go for things and, and some amazing stuff will happen and that all is, it's all worth it, so, yeah,
Hazel: and how like how does it feel even right now thinking about like You're in, like, the place that you wanted to be living in, that you didn't even know, you didn't even know existed, and you have created, like, a job that's even closer to this, like, dream job you've imagined. We also, you also spent time working in the mountains and skiing, we haven't even talked about that, [00:51:00] we're like, towards the end wrapping stuff up, like, there's so many, like, how does it feel now?
like thinking back over all of that and being like all of these things that were just dreams that you're like that would be amazing and like you have created it like you are living this life that you were just visualizing at one point it was this image in your mind and now like this is what you do every day and like you're in it like how does it feel
Aisha: Yeah, I mean, it, it's, it's it's hard not to feel like incredibly pleased. You basically feel like incredibly pleased with yourself because you're like, Wow, like I really, I really have done this. And I also, I've done this like amidst so much adversity as well. Like my, my dad got really ill last year and like all these other things.
And still you can create all of, and actually having all of this and having these dreams and things. make all of that stuff way easier to, to deal with [00:52:00] because, because you're still, you're still so purposeful. which is, yeah, it's, it's just so nourishing for the soul. yeah, no, it, I, I just, You just, I just, I was thinking when I, when I got this, sort of when I got this role, and I'm, I'm like, I'm here, and I feel like I'm in the right place, and, and, and I've kind of created all of this, and, and you do just feel incredibly empowered, which is, I think, a feeling that I, I realize I haven't, I haven't had like enough of.
Like I think a lot of, I think probably a lot of people can relate to that. Like I think we're, and, and you're like wow. Yeah, I, I can really affect change. Like how, how I react to things, how I think about things. one of my, one of my favorite things that you taught me was around times where you don't have very good quality of thought.
And I think that. Yeah, [00:53:00] you suddenly realise when you're having all these, like, these much better quality of thoughts when you're reflecting on things and, Yeah, no, I feel really, really proud of myself for doing all of this. yeah, so much joy, so much, so much excitement for the future as well, because, like, if I've managed to do all of this, like, what else?
What else can I do? Like, what else could I achieve? and I think I don't think we spend enough time celebrating, like, what we have done, I think we often, like, move on to the next thing. and so, yeah, I'm trying to, sort of, cherish it all and stuff for, for where I am and, yeah. Very joyful, Hazel.
Hazel: oh it's so good i could like feel that like coming out of you because i remember when you messaged but we were like When I was about to message you about the podcast and, you know, it was like, How are you feeling? And you were like, I feel powerful. And I was like, Oh, that's so good. Like, you know, it's like, just, and it is the best feeling when [00:54:00] not only have you like imagined and dreamed of something and created it, but like you've done it again and again and again and not in a way that's like forcing and achieving like I have to do this to be a good person.
It's like no, purely because it lights you up and purely because you're like this would be amazing. And this is really fun. And this is the like purest best expression of myself rather than like I have to prove something. It's just like such a different. like when it's coming from that place and just see, oh, just so amazing.
So, it's so good. And I guess just like as we're wrapping it up, like, firstly, thank you so much for coming on. Like, literally, I have so many more questions. We could talk for hours. We'll have to do another one. We'll, like, check in. Just, like, do it like a, an annual thing. But, what, yeah, I guess, is there any, like, anything you want to leave, like, wisdom for anyone else?
Or, a lesson that you've maybe learned over the last couple years? Like is there, if there's anything else that you want to share as just like a final piece? I mean you've shared so many [00:55:00] amazing nuggets but if there's anything, anything else?
Aisha: I, so, perfect is boring. That is, is so important to, to, like, for me to inhabit. And it's like, if you, if you think of anything that is perfect, or anyone that sort of appears perfect, or like a story that is basically, you know, Yes, I did this and I did that and then this happened. It's so boring And no one, I mean, I'd hate if anyone ever thought of me as boring, that feels very like opposite to, to how I am and like, but why am I often striving to basically be boring?
And, And so realising that that is not what I want to be, that, you know, I am enough and, and that level of like what is good [00:56:00] enough, like what's acceptable when it's not perfect and stuff, that's a really important thing that, that I feel like I've, I'm getting much better at like understanding when I'm trying to perfect something.
I'm spending, you know, like, what does it really mean if I've achieved that perfection? Often when you have achieved perfection you move on really quickly and don't really care about it. so yes, perfect is boring is the last thing I would like to share,
Hazel: good, so good, I love that. Well thank you so much for coming on, and, ah, this was just amazing. Thank you.
Aisha: Thank you for
Hazel: And we'll catch you next time. Bye.
Bye! I'm gonna try and hit stop recording. How do I stop? Stop.
Hey, thanks so much for listening. If this was helpful, please hit subscribe and leave a review. This helps get this work in the hands of more purposeful people. That is more people creating bigger, scarier goals, making an even bigger impact in the world. And if you [00:57:00] want to take this work deeper and work with me directly, head to the show note and I put all of the information there.
If you've got any questions or if there's anything you're like, ooh, I'd love you to talk about that on the pod, please just get in touch. I love hearing from you guys. And I'll see you next time in the Scary Ghouls Club.
