[00:00:00] Hi, and welcome to the Scary Goals Club. I am your host, Hazel Robertson, and I believe that to make the impact that you know you are called to make in the world, it requires setting bigger, scarier goals and then becoming the person who creates them. That is what I am here to show you how to do. That's what we are diving into with mindset tools.
Tricks. Really simple, practical, actionable steps you can take and start applying straight away. 'cause whatever you believe, we have this one life that we definitely know about. Start making the impact, you know you wanna make in the world. Fear is not a reason to stop. We keep going. We work through the fear.
That is what we do in the Scary Goals Club. So come on in, come join, hit subscribe, and let's get started.
Hello and welcome to the Scary Goals Club podcast. I am waving some burning palis Santo. If you're watching on video, my new favorite thing and bringing [00:01:00] in good energy for today's podcast smells so nice. It's so good, right? I'm gonna put it down. Um, I have also, if you're watching on video, I've tried to move back because.
Clips of the podcast for Instagram reels. It's like so zoomed in on my head. It's just like my whole head in the face. So I'm trying to step back, but it actually feels a little bit weird. 'cause normally it's just like, I don't know, like my, I a bit below my shoulders that you can see on the podcast and I'm like, oh, I can see all of me.
I've got the little like video screen wrapped up here. Maybe I should put it away. I don't know. I'll try. Maybe I'm gonna hide it. We'll see if that works better. But yeah, it's, it feels, it's almost like I feel more like I'm. Standing up giving a presentation rather than actually just chatting and having a conversation.
Maybe I can do a bit of. Changing with the Zoom or something on my camera. But anyway, here I am. I don't, I want it to feel still like a conversation and not like I'm like standing up here giving a presentation. [00:02:00] Normally I think I like rest against the desk and I'm kinda like leaning into the podcast, whereas now I'm kinda like stepping back a bit.
So I feel almost like a bit exposed. It's quite funny. But anyway, we're going to see, so if you're watching this, you can see a bit more of me and uh, hopefully when I do edit it. Into portrait and put it on Instagram reels. It's not quite as zoomed in on my head, but anyway. I'm sure any of you that are amazing at like editing and any of those skills or social media could probably gimme some other tips on that, but this is why I'm trying for today.
So today's podcast, I wanted to dive into something that. It's really fun that I've been playing with a lot more recently, like maybe over the last year, and it's kind of twist on a previous podcast episode that I've done and one of the tools that I use with my clients, which is, well, I'll talk about the twist, but one of the tools I use is to celebrate wins.
Now, we do this for loads of different reasons because [00:03:00] basically our brain, like on default, it's going to be focusing on. All of the things that we haven't done, all of the things that could go wrong, it's gonna, that's where it's gonna focus because we have the amygdala, which is in like the limbic system.
It's basically like this little fire alarm of our brain, and it's scanning for danger and it's looking for things that could go wrong, looking for like, oh, you didn't do this thing. Someone might ask for it or pull you up on it and like, you might be separated from the tribe. Like it's, it's trying to keep us alive.
And so it's looking for all the problems, all the danger, anything that could go wrong. What happens is like when we focus on that, we often like get really disheartened because we're like, oh, it's not gonna work. These are the problems and we can get really bogged down in it and it stops us like putting ourselves out there, going after our big scary goals, like stepping into who we wanna be, showing up powerfully, making bigger impact in the world.
It has us just like hiding and staying small. Instead, when we can work with our brain and like acknowledge the fear and talk kindly to our brain and like give ourselves a little hug and be nice to [00:04:00] ourselves. And we can focus on like retraining our brain to, it's almost like putting on different glasses.
It's like we put down the glasses of like everything could go wrong. These are all the things I haven't done. This is terrible because of this one thing I didn't do. And we put on the glasses of like, whoa, I did all these things. I showed up in this way. This is what's working, like celebrating all of the wins.
It. Not only does it feel amazing, but it gives us this dopamine boost, which is like a neuro neurotransmitter that helps us. It essentially like drives our motivation, helps us go and actually do things, and it reinforces the behavior of. Oh, I went and like showed up online and post was powerful and did the scary thing and I said no.
And I set my boundaries and I planned and I was organized and I decided who I wanted to be. Like. Anytime we celebrate ourselves for doing that, we're getting a little boost of dopamine that's saying, oh, this thing is good. And so it encourages us to do it again. So it's almost like rewarding the behavior that we want [00:05:00] to be doing and like changing how we wanna be.
And so it helps us show up and change our habits and show up who we wanna be. As who we wanna be. And also helps us like just get to our goals with so much more fun, so much more ease, because it's like it helps us also enjoy the process. 'cause what normally can happen is we're like, yes, but once I do the goal, then I will actually celebrate.
Then I'll tell myself I've done a good job. Then I'll tell myself like everything's working. And if we don't practice celebrating along the way, then when we get to the goal, we're not gonna suddenly just be like, oh, yay. If we're not in the practice of celebrating and the mindset of being like, how amazing.
By the time we get to the goal, we're like, yeah, but I'm not here yet. And it's like, we always will look for like our brain. Well, unless we train it, we'll always look for like, yeah, but I haven't done this but yet. Or like, yeah, but I didn't do that quite right. It will all always focus on the quote unquote negatives, but what we haven't done.
So it's training it now. The twist on that, that's been so fun. So over the last, yeah, I guess [00:06:00] year and a bit. I've been on a bit more of a spiritual, spiritual journey, and I spoke about this in my podcast, uh, just after New Year where it's like, ha, it's not really where I, in the past I've been very like, science focused and, and it's, which has been amazing and has been my background, but it's left.
Like not as much space for the magic. And I guess magic for me has always come from like nature and like being out in nature and noticing like small, tiny little things or like the way the light goes through the trees or like animals and like that brings in the feelings of magic. But it's like, since I've kind of understood a bit more about like manifestation and like the universe and like, I guess like stepped into having a more like just open spiritual.
I guess like relationship with the world It's just like, and bring burn burning pal santo, like having crystals, like all of that stuff, even though they're [00:07:00] really fun to fidget with. I've got one in my hand right now. Like all of that has just added in extra.
I guess it's like extra meaning and extra magic into the day to day, and it's just made. Every day just feel a little bit more fun, a little bit lighter. Even as I'm working towards my goals, even as some of them like, you know, I could easily get into like, it's not happening yet, and it's this, it's like, it just feels so fun.
And with this like slightly more spiritual nature connection, tapping into something higher, like higher consciousness, jour manifestation journey. What I have also been doing that's been really fun and I don't think I've like even really noticed that I've been doing this, but it's just been, it's been a really fun practice that's just like evolved organically, is I've been attaching meaning to things and making it mean that I am on my way to the goal.
So it's a little bit, it's like, it's like kind of a [00:08:00] twist on the celebrating wins, which is like we, I did all these things and that's great. What the practice I've been doing that's like, feels really fun is like things will happen. So I've been putting myself in positions, I guess like going for walks, going out into like just like listening to my intuition, staying open, going in, having like more open experiences.
And like as I've been doing that, I've been noticing more things coming up and it's then adding that meaning that these things mean that I'm on the right track. So it's also like. When we're believing any thought that we want, because here's the way our brain works, something. There's like things outside of us, things that will happen, things in the world.
Then our brain attaches meaning to them. It attaches a story of like, oh, this thing happened, it means this, or it means this about me based on like our upbringing, our past, like our caregivers, our authority figures, society, things that have happened to us that we've like internalized and our subconscious mind like.
[00:09:00] Creates this bank of beliefs and this is how we quote unquote see the world. And this can all be changed and all be rewired. And this is, our brains have this amazing thing called neuroplasticity. So it's like just because we have believed something in the past and we have this neural pathway, this connection formed, and that's our default, and therefore we behave a certain way.
As soon as we notice it and start to question it and start to then like behave a different way and think a different way, we will actually start to change it. And it's almost like that neural pathway just doesn't become. Used as much anymore and we start to default to a new way of being. It's the same with the celebrating wins.
Like once we get into the habit and we benefit, benefit practice, seeing the wins, like and celebrating them, we will see them everywhere and it will be like, oh, this thing will happen. Yes, it means this. I'm like, yes, yes, yes. We'll be celebrating all the things. And it, it's like it will just happen that our brain will naturally default to this went well and this went well, and how cool was this and how cool was this?
And it's the same for like attaching meaning is like. We can decide to attach [00:10:00] any story that we want to, anything that happens. And often what happens is something like will happen externally and we will attach a quote, unquote, more negative story that makes us feel bad in some way. That's like, oh, this means I'm not good enough.
This means I failed. This means I've this, this means I'm this. Like we can, something will happen and we can make it mean something. About ourselves that makes us feel rubbish. That makes us feel kinda shut down and just a bit like, ugh. Instead, we can like, have, go out and have these amazing experiences.
Or actually anything could happen. It could be like, I didn't get that thing done. Cool. It means I'm on track for my goals. Or like, I got an email that I didn't wanna get, or like a negative quote unquote negative comment, and it's like, that means this is working. That means I'm like reaching people or people are interested or whatever the, the thing is, it's like literally.
Anything, which is why it's so important to understand this. Look, the situation, the facts, our environment, the thing, and then there's our thoughts, our beliefs about it, and that's the meaning that our brain attaches to our brain. And [00:11:00] we can be conscious about that. We can be intentional about that. We can decide what is it I wanna believe about this thing that's going to help me move towards where I want to go, rather than like.
Oh, it means this thing, and I'm just this. And it's like we spin out and then we don't wanna do anything and we're not showing up how we want to, we're not making the impact, we're not going after our scary goals. And it's just like we just spin out and then nothing happens. And so attaching the meaning, it's like you can actually decide anything that happens and be like, what do I wanna make it mean about me?
Or if there's a belief that you're practicing something new, you wanna believe about yourself and about what is possible and about the goals you want to create, you can then find. All of the evidence that that's true and it can literally be anything. So I'll give you an example of something that I hadn't fully realized and then it happened on the walk today and I was like, oh, interesting.
How fun is that? I'm gonna do a podcast on it. So I was out just for this walk, like ev on my working days, I'll go for a walk or run before I actually start and I'm just like, do meditation often and or like visualization, just like. [00:12:00] Being outside, looking up at the trees, just like observing, being present, and just, it connects me with something bigger in nature, something bigger than me, like the universe, the world.
And it just helps me feel so expansive, so like energized and just like ready for the day and it gets my blood flowing, like with the walking or the running. And I noticed that there was this. Like little movement on the tree. And I looked over and it was this tiny little Ren, which is this, I dunno if you've ever seen a ren wherever you're listening in the world, this is in Scotland.
They're like these tiny little birds, like so small, like a few inches, two inches long, maybe not even that. And their tail like flicks right up and they kind of like flit around from different places. And normally you don't see them 'cause they're, they can be into the undergrowth or like. They, they're, they're quite small, so they're hard to see, but it was like the sun was coming through the trees.
This like little rain was like on the branch and immediately my brain was like, I'm on the right [00:13:00] track. Like my goals are happening, like this is happening. And it's like whenever I, I'm feeling in that place. And I think it's almost, maybe I've attached the meaning unintentionally because oftentimes I'm out in nature.
I'm doing these meditations, I'm like visualizing and imagining my goals and feeling so elevated and like, oh my gosh, this is happening. This is possible. This is like. This is definitely happening. And then sometimes there'll be like a red kite, like bird will fly over or like a buzzard will fly over. Or like a few weeks ago saw like two pheasants and they were like, oh, like fighting each other with their claws.
So, and there was two buzzards just before it. And I looked up at the buzzards and then saw the pheasants and it's like whenever I've been, 'cause I do a lot of visualization and this in nature and because there's loads of birds around, I guess it's almost like my brain has made the connection of like.
This is happening. Like when I do the visualization, I'm like, oh, this is happening. Like my goals are happening, like this is happening, and then I'll see some [00:14:00] bird. So now it's almost like when I am out and in that place and I will see a bird be like, oh, I'm on the right track. Oh, like keep going. So it's almost like, and then it was so fun.
I came back in here and I was like getting ready for. Like my day and getting ready for a few things and I looked out, I went over to the window. I've got like a candle that I light by the window to just like, again, bring in the intention and set the intention for the day. Went over to light the candle and just out the, where I'm coaching is just above the front door and there's this like lth.
She not shelter, rain cover thing. I don't know what it would be. Porch bit over the front door. And I looked out and there was this sparrow just like sitting there and like the sun was on it and it was like blossoming the trees behind. And it's like the sparrow was sitting there and like literally looked up at me and I just like stopped and just watched it and it looked at me and it was like watching me through the window and I was just watching it like for ages and it was such an amazing [00:15:00] moment.
And it's like. Again, in that moment I was like setting my intention for the day and being like, okay, this is how today's gonna go and this is how I want to be and this is what it's gonna be like. And then that connection with the bird, it was like, oh, I'm on the right track. Like this is it. Like this is happening.
And it's just like two tiny micro moments, but like literally they have brought so much joy, so much like. Just this feeling of not being, not it just being me, this feeling of like, whoa, there's so much, like so many amazing things happening in the world and like nature and yeah, like the universe and like all of this, like being connected and I'm this tiny part in it and it's like, oh, I just, it just like puts me in such an amazing place and it's like I, I've attached that meaning.
Like seeing a bird and being like, you're on the right track. And so it's like whenever I'm going through my day, like that's a few times I've been just like going about my day to [00:16:00] day seeing birds and it's this like little boost, it's like a dopamine boost. It's like I feel good and I'm like, you're on the right track.
Keep going. Like you're doing it, like you're doing amazing, like your goals are happening and it's just like, oh, here we go. And you could do it like with anything. So say you even had like. I'm looking at, it's like your goals written down or like a goal that you're working towards, like written down on a post-it note and you post it, like I've got like mine written down there and it's like on my, my, um, computer monitor.
Like say you had yours. There again, you could train your brain that you could even write the thought you wanted underneath to that you're practicing believing, and you could. Train your brain to see the goal and be like, it's happening, and just feel that in your body of like, oh yeah, it's happening.
You're on track. Again, it's like finding the evidence for something. We wanna believe that our goals are happening, that we are living the life that we wanna live, that like everything is working out in our favor, that we are stepping into the most like vibrant powerful version of ourselves that like, of course our [00:17:00] scary goals are gonna happen.
Of course, it's all gonna happen and we can set up these. Little connections that like when something happens that's just at a random time, like you see a bird, which happens literally all the time, or glance at a post-it note that's got your goal on it, then suddenly you're just, it's like a chance to practice that new belief again and be like, oh, I'm on track.
Rather than like what could happen, like for example, I could see my goal written down and be like, oh, it's never gonna happen. Like that could be a default. It's like we can train our brain to be like, oh, it is on, it is on. Like this is happening. Here we go. This is literally just the start, like let's go.
And it's like we can do that with anything. So it could even be, I mean, you could even do it like, yeah, I didn't get that thing done, or I got the, or like I'm going into a meeting. It's like, oh, this is gonna be amazing. It's like we can start to, any belief that we wanna believe we can have some like. We can add meaning to anything.
We can have a trigger point or a something and be like, what is it we wanna attach meaning to? That's [00:18:00] going to help us not the g default of like that our brain could be like, oh, it's this, it's this, it's this. It's like this thing happens and we're like, oh, this means I'm on the right track. Like this is totally happening.
And there's another example of that, actually, two more examples of it, where it was like, it is kind of the celebrating wins, but it's also attaching the meaning and it they're, they're not dissimilar. Two of them. So the first one was like years ago. I can't even think when I did it. I did. So in it just outside Edinburg to south of Edinburgh is a thing called the Pentlands.
It's this like range of hills and there's a route called the Pentland skyline. So every year, I think it's October, there's like a local hill running group and they, they do like an outer back and it's like, I can't even remember what the elevation is. It's pretty punchy for being like hills. It's not like in the mountains.
I think it's 16 miles, but it's pretty like up and down, up and down, up and down. I remember I did it, I don't think I was like super fit at the time and it was maybe a really hot day or something, but I like. Went out was running the pendulum skyline just on my own, not as part of the [00:19:00] race. And I was so tired and so hot.
Don't I really had enough food. Didn't have like that much in the tank left. And I was like at the furthest point away, so like about to turn back and come back and I was like, like taking two steps up the hill and I was like, I'm so goosed. I am so gay. I am so done. My legs were so bubbling, I was like sitting down on the grass.
I was like, oh my gosh. And I was like, no. Okay, here we go. Had a little word with myself was like, of course I'm doing it. And I every like, I started, I guess it's kind of like celebrating every win, but like every random thing that I passed, I was like, oh, I'm doing it. Oh, I'm almost there. Oh, I've come so far.
Oh, this hill's really easy. So it was like, so for example, I would go past and there'd be this like boulder and I'd be like, touch the boulder and be like. When I pass this boulder or like passing this high fiving this boulder, like that means I'm gonna do it. Or it'd be like a, a scraggly bit of a fence post that was like a bit broken.
It'd be like, oh, [00:20:00] that fence post. I've come so far. And it was just like literally these were every. I dunno, three or four steps. There was so many, but it was just like, Ooh, that means this, that means this, that means this. And it was like almost like high fiving these things on the way around. Even just mentally being like, Ooh, that means I'm gonna do it.
That means, oh my gosh, I've come so far. And literally within a matter of like minutes, my state had changed. I had so much more energy. I was feeling more like, okay, I'm totally doing it. It wasn't even like. I can do this. It was like I'm doing it. It was like I am already doing it, like I'm there. Like this is totally done.
It was just in such a different place. And the other example of that was a few weeks ago, like Flynn and I climbed the local hill. And normally, so there's like a gate that you get to that's like not that far from the car park. And that was as far as he'd got to before. And I was like, we'll just see how far we get.
But like had loads of snacks, plenty of time, and. We just focused on like high fiving things. So it was like, oh, we can highfive the gate and like it [00:21:00] means we've come so far and it's happening. Like, oh my gosh, you're so gonna do the top. You're so gonna get to the top. And it'd like highfive the gate, and then we'd like stop for a snack.
And then it was like, there were all these signposts up the way, and it's like every time we got the signposts, I'd be like, there's a boulderer, right? Oh my gosh. It means like, we're gonna get to the top. Look how far you've come. And it was that whole, I guess it's like a combo of the, like the wins, which is, look how far you've come, you're doing it and the like.
This means getting to here means you're gonna do it means it's done. Like you've already done it. It's almost like we are so doing it. Like you just hit that boulder, it means we're doing it. Ah. And it was so fun to watch because like you'd like start to point things out and be like that one, like run up and high five it.
Or even be like. The markers would show you like which way to go. He'd be like, ah, marker. And like running up to it. And it's just when we can again start to like not only celebrating the progress a hundred percent, that's so powerful, but like attaching the meaning to literally, you can choose anything.
Anything that happens. It could be a bird flying past. It means, actually, I just remember another, [00:22:00] another example of this, and maybe this is where the bird thing came from. So I remember in my hire, so fifth year of school. I can't even remember how old would I have been? 14, 15? I can't even remember something like that.
Me and one of my neighbors used to walk up to school together. It was like 10 minutes up the road and it was the day of my physics, higher physics exam or some exam or something. And we were walking up and we went to cross the road, and in between these two parked cars, there was a dead bird, like in the gutter or like just lying at the side of the road.
And she was like, dead bird. That means it's lucky or like it's lucky or something like that. And I was like, oh. And now like literally, and then I went into the physics exam being like, cool, I saw a dead bird. It means it's lucky, like, and just was so, it was just like, again, another thing to attach some random meaning to that's gonna make you feel good.
I'm gonna help you. It's like, why not? It could have been like two parked cars. It's lucky. Or like, you know, you can do it for [00:23:00] literally anything.
so I, maybe that's where like. The bird thing came from, and then whenever, like literally since that, since I've been 15, whenever I've seen a dead bird, I've been like, oh, that's lucky.
Like something good's gonna happen. And then it's like flying birds. It's like, ah, I'm on the right track. Here we go. And even seeing, again, getting a bit more into like the spiritual side of things and manifestation and like, like seeing numbers and being like seeing one like 1111 and it's like, oh, 11, 11.
Sometimes I'm like, right. It's almost like, what was I doing at that moment? Or what was I thinking? And that's a chance to be like, I'm on the right track. Keep going. This is happening. So it's like we can, when we train our brain to attach positive meaning to things, literally it feels so good because there's so many times during the day that we have a chance to be like, oh, this is so good.
This means it's working. This means everything's like, or even the other example of that is like. I often like with clients when they're [00:24:00] practicing, if there's, there was someone they work with, for example, or someone in their life where they have an experience and it can bring up, it can feel triggering or it can bring up some old beliefs.
It's like reframing that to be like every time you feel that that is a chance, like something was there anyway. And it's like. You can lean into it and be like, yes, this is a chance to practice not reacting in the way I, I used to and like practice taking care of myself. Practice changing how I wanna think.
Practice showing up in a different way. And it's the same. It's like you, an event that would normally feel like, oh, oh, we can actually reframe it as like, Ooh, I want to go do this thing because this means. I'm becoming more of who I am. This is a chance to practice. This is a chance to lean into it. So it's the same with anything like humans.
We are going around trying to make sense of the world and attach meaning, and so. Take like find meaning in everything, but find meaning in a way that's gonna help you. So even just like writing out what are some of the beliefs you're wanting to believe, what do you wanna believe about [00:25:00] your goals?
That they're definitely happening. That of course you're gonna be like impacting all those people and changing the world in the way you want to. And of course this is gonna be happening, like whatever those beliefs are. And then start. Attaching that meaning to different things.
Pick a bird or something. Like play around with like, what could feel really fun for you and just be like, what do I wanna make this mean? What could I, how could it's, it's like that other way of thinking about it is like, how could I make everything that happens for me? Okay, I'll say that again. How so even answering this question, how could I make every single thing that happens?
How could I make that for me? How could actually anything that happens, whether I choose it or I don't, how could I actually add the meaning and decide that this is moving me where I want to go, whether I'm learning from it, whether I'm practicing something, whether it's a chance to practice my skills, or whether I'm like, Ooh, this means I'm right on [00:26:00] track.
This means it's definitely happening. Good things are happening today. So just playing around with that. Okay. Let me know what you think. Or I'd also love to hear from you, like if you've got certain things that you like attach meaning to or that you use in ways to help you, like please reach out. Like I'd love to hear from you.
Like I'd just absolutely love all this stuff. So happy, manifesting, happy, creating your scary goals, happy deciding that literally anything that happens is for you and is moving you where you want to go. Okay, enjoy. Hope you have an amazing rest of the day, an amazing week ahead, and I'll see you next time.
Bye.
Hey, thanks so much for listening. If this was helpful, please hit subscribe and leave a review. This helps get this work in the hands of more purposeful people. That is more people creating bigger, scarier goal making an even bigger impact in the world. And if you wanna take this work deeper and work with me directly, head to the show note, and I put all of the information there.
If you've got any questions or if there's anything you're like, Ooh, I'd love you to talk about that on the pod, [00:27:00] please just get in touch. I love hearing from you guys, and I'll see you next time in the Scary Goals Club.
