[00:00:00] Hi, and welcome to the Scary Goals Club. I am your host, Hazel Robertson, and I believe that to make the impact that you know you are called to make in the world, it requires setting bigger, scarier goals and then becoming the person who creates them. That is what I am here to show you how to do. That's what we are diving into with mindset tools.
Tricks. Really simple, practical, actionable steps you can take and start applying straight away. 'cause whatever you believe, we have this one life that we definitely know about. Start making the impact, you know you wanna make in the world. Fear is not a reason to stop. We keep going. We work through the fear.
That is what we do in the Scary Goals Club. So come on in, come join, hit subscribe, and let's get started.
Hi, and welcome to Scary Goals Club podcast. It is a lovely sunny Friday. It's so warm. I'm recording this and I'm in such a cheery mood because I [00:01:00] have been out for a walk. I have had, I think. My new, this is like the third or fourth one I've had this summer. My new favorite drink for the summer iced oat chai latte.
I don't really have chai lattes that much. If I was to go out, like I wouldn't always have a warm one, but like whenever I do I'm like, oh, this is so nice. But I was just fancying something like I didn't want water. I didn't want like fizzy water. I didn't really want like an iced coffee. It was like, I want be a bit sweeter but cold 'cause it's like pretty warm here.
And iced boat chai latte. I highly recommend if you can find somewhere that we'll do one. It's so good and it's so nice and like warming and like all the spices and, ugh. So good. New favorite drink and I just had like, it was just so nice like being out for a little wonder on the trails to this like cute coffee shop cafe that's like maybe like a 10, 15 minute walk from where I am.
Eating wild raspberries on the way, like they're all coming out, especially [00:02:00] the ones that have like been in the sun, like some big juicy ones heading up. And I was going on to do some work and I forgot my laptop, but I did. So I like literally got there and I was like almost about to walk in. I was like, my bag feels really light.
And I'd taken my laptop downstairs. I just hadn't actually put it in my bag and, but I did have my journal and so it was just so nice. I was like, okay, no laptop. That's okay. Like I will do stuff that just like the thinking and like sitting down. I just like sat outside in the shade looking at the like long grasses, like swishing and the blue sky and the like swallows were darting about and it was just like, this is so nice.
Had my ice oat chai latte and just like. Planned some things out, dreamed about. Some things was like, okay, what is this? Like just there's a few different things happening in the background was like imagining some of that and like figuring some of those things out. So good. Highly recommend if [00:03:00] you like even just like mixing up the workday a bit and like getting out into cafe.
Like I do that anyway, but actually going out. And having something, I haven't done this in a while, like definitely like a couple months where I've gone out, not with my laptop, just with a notebook to like jot down ideas or like map things out or gone out for a walk. I go out for walks and like think about things, but actually going to like a nice buzzy cafe, having someone bring like a, an amazing, yummy drink and you just get to sit and be like, taken care of and like it's so nice.
And that connection and that interaction just feels, just gives such a boost as well. So I got all topped up with that amazing boost this morning and then I've come back and I'm like, right, let's go and record this podcast.
And today we are diving into. Not waiting. Okay. So we're gonna dive into where in your life might you be waiting, waiting on something to happen, waiting for someone else, waiting for something to change before you go. [00:04:00] And then do what you actually want to do. And I'm gonna read a bit from a book because this, the idea for this podcast has come so many times over the last few weeks, maybe even a month or so.
And it's the book. Oh, the Places You'll Go By Dr. Seuss. I dunno if you've read it. I love it. And my son loves it and I love reading it to him. It's basically about life and how some things work out and some things don't and it's okay and different bits about life. And it's got really fun pictures as well.
And it's, it's, it rhymes. And so it's really fun to read as well. And there's this bit in it, and every time I'm reading it to him. I'm like, okay, I'll take the book through to the coaching, to the coaching room, my office. That'll remind me to do podcasts on it. And then every time I've gone to record a podcast, I've forgotten that, oh wait, who's gonna do one on this today?
I finally remembered, okay, it's gonna be the podcast on not waiting around, not waiting for something else. So [00:05:00] I'm trying to think exactly where to start from. Some, maybe that's not as relevant. I wanna get to the like. Okay, so this is about like where you're just figuring things out in life and you're in a, in unknown territory.
Here we go. Maybe I'll read this bit out as well. Okay. So I'm gonna read it out and then we'll chat about, we'll have a little book club review of, of the bit that I think is really important. So the bit that really jumped out to me is his description of. Waiting and just see if this resonates. Okay. You.
So again, this is like someone going on an adventure and they're getting to a place in life where there's no path. They don't really know exactly where they're going. They have to figure out for themselves, which is a lot like when we are going towards our goals. We've never done it before. That's why we maybe don't know exactly how it's gonna work out.
And it's new and everything feels a bit [00:06:00] different. And so see if it resonates with that. Okay. Should I hold it up so you can see? I've got my little post-it note where to stop. Okay. Ahem. I feel like I'm like reading at school or something. Okay. You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.
It's so funny. I'm reading I, I literally. Me and my son both. We just know all the words by heart. So like sometimes when I'm reading it to him, I'll like show him the pictures and I can't see the words 'cause I'm like behind and I can like literally do it off the top of my head. But I'm gonna read it anyway.
Okay.
"You will come to a place where the streets are not marked. Some windows are lighted, but mostly they're dark. A place you could sprain in both your elbow and chin. Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in? How much can you lose? How much can you win? And if you go in, should you turn left or right or right and three quarters or maybe not quite, or go around back and sneak in from behind.
Simple. It's not, I'm afraid. You will find for a mind maker upper to make up his [00:07:00] mind. You can get still confused that you'll starting to race down long wiggled roads at a break, necking pace and grind on for miles across Weirdish Wild Space. Headed, I fear towards a most useless place. The waiting place for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come, or a plane to go, or the mail to come, or the rain to go, or the phone to ring. Or the snow to snow, or waiting around for a yes or no or waiting for their hair to grow. Everyone is just. Waiting. Waiting for the fish to bite or waiting for wind to fly a kite or waiting around for Friday night or waiting perhaps for their Uncle Jake, or a pot to boil, or a better break, or a string of pearls or a pair of pants, or a wig with curls, or another chance.
Everyone is just waiting. No, that's not for you. [00:08:00] Somehow you'll escape all that waiting and staying. You'll find the bright places where boom bands are playing. With banner flip flapping. Once more, you'll write high ready for anything under the sky ready because you're that kinda guy."
Okay. I will stop there, but, and I'm gonna open the door because it is so warm in here.
Whew. Let's get a bit of air. Whew. To bring in. I've got fan for sleeping at the moment. Need to almost bring it in. So if you can see the sweat like beading on my head, then I apologize. Sure. You're exactly the same at the moment. Wherever you are. Well, no, if you're in the southern hemisphere, I take that back, that's probably a little bit different.
Or if you're maybe a little bit further North than here. So I just love it so much. That description of like people just waiting, and I'm sure you can think of maybe a time in your life where you've just been waiting, like waiting for a yes or a no. It's like you're, it's like waiting on someone else to make a decision and it's like you're kinda like, uh, do I do this?
Do I [00:09:00] do this? Do I do this? It's like that waiting place, almost like that limbo of just feeling a bit stuck. It's like. Waiting on someone else, waiting on some external conditions, waiting on like something to happen
or maybe if you're not fully into what you're doing and super passionate about it. It's like waiting for the Friday night. So it's like, ah, I can go and do something else. Waiting for another chance, waiting for a better break, waiting for someone to come along and be like, here, do this thing. Like I've come to save you and give you your break.
I remember like thinking back, how old would I have been? Oh, I can't remember. Definitely at some point in my twenties, maybe just after uni when I realized, oh, literally no one is coming to save me. No one, I guess throughout school I'd always had, you know, teachers that had believed in me and been like, oh, here this, or like pushed me.
Especially I went to school in the States and they'd be like, here you can, you're interested in [00:10:00] this. Go and think about these things and go and do this extra credit. And I like lapped it all up. I like loved it all. And then it was after uni or maybe during my master's, I can't really remember where.
Suddenly it dawned on me, oh no one is just coming. To say, here you go. Here is this perfect career I've laid out and you are gonna love it, and we're gonna make sure you're always playing to your strengths, and we're gonna make sure the job you do is just like perfectly suited to who you are and what you want.
Even though you maybe haven't asked yourself what you want and you're not being honest with what you actually want and what actually lights you up on what you're really interested in. And it was that realization, oh, it's literally on me. It's on me to decide. What I want and then go and create that. Or make that happen.
but there have been so many times where I have been waiting, waiting on something different. And I chatted about this in last week's episode. How often it can be like, oh, okay, cool, it's [00:11:00] summer. I'll start this other thing in September when like I'm back from holiday. Yeah, I'll just put off this thing I really wanna do.
I'm just gonna put it off until September, or maybe it's coming into Christmas, like I'm just gonna wind down for the end of the year and just do whatever. I'll start it in the new year or I'll start it when I'm less busy. I'll start it. Tomorrow I'll change. I'll do this thing another day and whatever that is, think if there's something for you where at the moment, maybe this is something that's happened in the past, but is there something right now where you're slightly, if you are really honest with yourself and no shame, like we all do this, you're slightly waiting on something or someone to change before you get to go and do something differently or live out your dreams or change, just like thinking about that.
Oh, I would do this, but I can't because of this reason or I can't because it's not the right time or I can't because so-and-so's doing this other [00:12:00] thing and it's almost waiting it, it is. It's a way. The reason we do it is it's a way for our brain to. I have an excuse and outsource delay. Our brain loves to delay change, even if the change is something you actually want.
Even if you know you want to go and create that scary goal, you know you wanna change something, you know you wanna do something differently. You know that. If there's something that lights you up, you're like, oh, you're getting those soul whispers. You know, for me it was starting the podcast and there was always a reason for me to delay it.
Always a reason for three years, and I'd even thought about it before that. But from three years from actually recording episodes and never publishing them, there was always a reason to wait, wait until I'm thinking of some of the examples. Oh, I'll wait until I have more experience. I'll wait until. I have more clients.
I, I'll wait until I've been coaching for this amount of time. I'll wait until there's always, it was waiting for something external to change before I could give [00:13:00] myself permission or would give myself permission to do the thing I actually wanted to do. And where in your life are you waiting for something to change?
So that you might feel, you think you might feel differently, then you will go do the thing, live out your dreams, do the thing that you actually wanna do, and I just wanna offer what, if you notice that got awareness around it. Awareness is amazing because, and again, anytime you have awareness, anytime you're looking at something where you are maybe not quite living in the way you want, or you're maybe hiding a bit or you're waiting or you're giving someone else or something else.
Control over what you think is possible for you and in what timeframe. Just doing it with so much love and compassion, with curiosity of like, oh, that is so interesting. Now I have this awareness. Now I can change it. Not doing it with shame. Not judging yourself, not beating yourself up, being like, oh, I can't believe I'm waiting around for this thing and blah, blah.
It's like that is gonna just make you wanna avoid it even more. But if you can do it with love and compassion, [00:14:00] just say, interesting. I am hesitating on this thing. I am waiting, waiting for something to happen. Before I can go and enjoy myself waiting for something to change. the reason that we do anything that we want, any goal or anything to any outcome in our life is because of how we think it's gonna make us feel.
And so often we can say, and before we learn these tools, like when you understand how your mind works and how your emotions work, and when you can generate any feeling on purpose, like that's what we do in coaching That is the key skill of learning. Oh wait, I don't need to wait for something external to change, to get, to change the way I feel, to get to change the way I show up, to get to change the way I am behaving.
I can just go and do those things now and change those things now, even if nothing around me is changing. Even if everyone is behaving the same. My situation is the same. I actually get to change me and make that decision and go and do something differently. I get to feel differently, even again, if nothing else has changed.
And again, a few weeks ago, I think I mentioned, it was like [00:15:00] I was wanting this feeling of almost like spaciousness or ease or something with, we're renting a house at the moment and with like, oh, I can only get that when we have our own house and it has to look like this and it has to be this. And it's like, no, I can create that feeling for myself right now, even in a rental property, even in a place that's not ours.
That, sure, we'd love to like paint it all, but we're like, well, if we're moving out in a few months, six months a year, do we wanna paint? Do we wanna paint it all? Probably not. And just. But I can still give myself that feeling of spaciousness and get that in other ways without having to be like, once I move into this house, I get that feeling of spaciousness, that feeling of ease.
It's like, oh, I can give that self my to myself right now. That's why I'm craving. And when we do that, then we realize, oh, I don't need to wait on these external things to happen. Because again, that's when, going back to a few episodes ago, that's when we can get really, really attached to an outcome because we think.
If this thing happens, then I get to feel [00:16:00] differently. So like, if this person behaves differently, then I get to do better at my job. Or like, and again, this is like not ignoring that there can be a lot of toxic people in the workplace, like ignoring that of course, but waiting on someone else to change or show up differently.
And it's like, well, I can't do this because they're doing that thing. It's like, what if that was never even. Like an option or the same thing of, I'll wait until I have more time. I'll wait until this thing's outta the way. I'll wait until summer's over. I'll wait until all these things. What if that wasn't an option?
What would you do? Like what are you, what do you truly want to do that maybe you're slightly delaying and is actually an excuse from your brain because your brain wants you to stay the same. It doesn't want anything to change. It will find reasons why now is not the right time and. You have to wait for something external to change before you get to do anything differently or like feel better, but it just feels so powerless.
It's like the waiting, people just waiting and it's like waiting around for [00:17:00] something to happen before they can go and live their lives. It's like that is not a way that we wanna be living our lives. So if this is you and there's been something, or there's maybe something that you're slightly waiting on, what if you didn't?
Like? What if. That thing, like almost imagine that thing was never gonna change. It was never gonna happen. What would you then do? So with the example here, it's like someone waiting for the snow to snow or like waiting for a train to cut, a train to go. And it's like, what if that was never gonna happen?
What would you go and do? How would you take what it is you actually want into your own hands? And like what are you in control of? How do you wanna show up? How do you wanna think about it? What do you wanna go and change? And actually go and change that now and not wait for permission or wait for someone else to change or to say yes or no or some external thing to change.
What if you just go and decide right now that you're gonna change something?
[00:18:00] Okay. I'm so warm. I'm so warm right now. I don't even know what temperature is up here. Probably not as hot as even in other parts of Scotland in the uk, but it feels really warm. Okay. The final thing I wanna just leave you with is there's these amazing Louise Hay cards that I have and. They're so nice, like at the start of each day.
Sometimes if I see them and I'm like, oh, I'm gonna pick one, I'll go and just shuffle them and then just pick one that I'm kinda drawn to. And it's, I just believe that it always has a message that I need to hear. And it's just such a, it's such an amazing way to just bring in other inspiration, other bits of wisdom.
So today's one, I'm gonna share it with you because it just resonates a lot with things that are happening with me at the moment where there's a lot of like. Change and growth and things shifting and it just feels amazing, but also can feel like a bit like, oh, I'm settling and there's uncertainty as well.
Today is one is I am flexible and flowing. I am [00:19:00] flexible and flowing. How good is that? And then it says on the back, I am open to the new and changing every moment presents a wonderful new opportunity to become more of who I am. I flow with life easily and effortlessly, and I just love that of like the flexibility, the flow of like life is always changing.
It's ebbing and flowing and rather than feeling like it's this scary thing and resisting and forcing and trying to clinging on and control and. Play small and stay where we are. It's like opening ourselves up to just the natural flow and the ebb and flow and the rhythms of life and nature that is always cyclical.
It's always changing, and us as humans, we're always, we have this insatiable desire to understand more about ourselves and the world and to learn more and to challenge ourselves and to. What we are actually capable of, which is always so much more than we give ourselves credit for. And so much more than our scared brain wants to help us realize.
And [00:20:00] so just by it's like flexible and flowing, it's like opening up to the change and just seeing it as like things are changing and it's this like opportunity to become more of who you are. Like what if that's true? What if when things are changing and things are uncertain. Things are moving and shifting in your life.
This is a chance to become more of who you are and lean into that, like the change. It's like, I imagine it almost this like swirling river or like a cloud, like a fluffy cloud, like carrying you along and you can force and struggle against it. Or you can just like, I guess with the stream analogy, the river, it's like, oh, you can just literally lie back, float close your eyes.
And just be like taken downstream, flowing with the current and just like going with the flow, enjoying it, and just becoming more of who you are and knowing that these changes are taking you where you wanna be going. And that is amazing things. And sometimes it requires [00:21:00] letting go of. Things that have been amazing, but they're not fully, fully aligned.
They're not fully, fully where you're actually going and it can feel hard 'cause there's a grieving process with things that are familiar. Even if we don't ultimately want them, they're not ultimately coming where we want to go. There's still a grieving process and a letting go and like when we can just let go and kind of shed these things.
Whether it's old beliefs, old ways of being, people, relationships, places, careers, jobs, habits, like whatever they are, like old ways of being and like connections we've had and our environments in the world. When we can like let those go and just like surrender to where we are going, and trust that if we stay open and we stay true to our values and reminding ourself of like who we are and what's important to us and just keep following.
What lights us up. And just leaning into that like we are gonna be guided somewhere that is ultimately where we wanna go. And even if it feels a bit scary, [00:22:00] even if it's uncertain, just trusting that we are always gonna be taken care of and always gonna be okay. And the more that we can just like release and surrender and be flexible and flowing, the more like we're just gonna enjoy the journey and the process.
So I wanna leave that with you and. If there's something that you're waiting around on, what if you just let that go as well? What if it was like almost never gonna happen? How would you live your life? Or what if it was guaranteed? How would you live your life? Like you can play with those things as well.
Okay, I hope you have an amazing rest of the day and an amazing week ahead, and I will see you next time. Bye.
Hey, thanks so much for listening. If this was helpful, please hit subscribe and leave a review. This helps get this work in the hands of more purposeful people. That is more people creating bigger, scarier goal, making an even bigger impact in the world. And if you wanna take this work deeper and work with me directly, head to the show note, and I put all of the information.
If you've got any [00:23:00] questions or if there's anything you're like, Ooh, I'd love you to talk about that on the pod, please just get in touch. I love hearing from you guys, and I'll see you next time in the Scary Goals Club.
